hey . back back blog . yuppee . another month over . hahas . exam coming , stress going to come . but vacation is coming . hahas .good !!!! ;D see i so good . today rain cats and dogs again . o MY ! before i go to my cheerleading training later , i'm going to post first . so later dont have to post . hahas . yeps . i'm so bad . really . haiis . i rejected him . i told him that i dont wna not fair to him . because , i have someone in mind . i'm really sorry if i really hurt yoo . i keep saying sorry to him . but he like keep "hehe" . i know perhaps he is pretending . buts i'm really damn sorry . because i not dont like you , and also scared of you . dont worrie much much ok . i'm sorry . really . dont think other way . you say just wanna a shot . i hope you really think that . and be friends with me . i regard you as my best friend , brother , so i'm happy to have you this brother , so good to me . i tell you so many things , i hope you really understand me . and hope to see ya soon . i dont want to bluff you , lie you , so i honest to you . i dont want hurt you more. sorry. hope you found your sweetheart soon ~ ;)

and i felt i'm really bad at times . say ppl this and that . i'm really so bad . but do you know it hurt me so much . so if i dont tell , i was like bluffin myself , lie to myself , have to act infront of you so good to you , so close to you , i'm so scared . whenever i saw you , see you , i rmb all the things you treat me . and tears begin to rolled down my cheeks , i'm so scared , why you so good to me ? are you using me ? i'm so scared of you , really , i told everyone that , we are not as close as what you all think . maybb i'm thinkin , we are acting infront of each other, acting infront of everyone . as for now , i'm so afraid of you , really it's hurt me lots , because of you , all my friends thought i change alot , drift apart from me . because of you , all my friends dont wna join me . i wondering what more you want me to do to let me go ? i'm so sick of you . stick with me , are you serious? i'm scared . scared . why you are like ghost hunting me all day long ? why why why why ?


i'm going off training now .
i'm really sorry what i have done to you . ;(
please leave me alone . *